Dancing With the Stars: Week 6

A group hip hop dance featuring these old white people? Mr. Michael Flatley, the Lord of the Dance himself, filling in for head judge Len Goodman? You knew coming in that this was going to be a weird week.






MAURICE:
Maurice and his partner Cheryl did a Viennese Waltz, which proved to be a tough dance for him. Maurice has proved to be the type of guy who can really pour on the exuberance and charm, which goes a long way when the dance calls for a little of the ol' razzmatazz. But the Waltz is all about serenity, fluidity, and precision, which are not Maurice's strong suits. He did okay, but only merited a 21 from the judges, which is a score that is cause for worry at this stage of the competition. He gave us his catchphrase of "winner, winner, chicken dinner," but he was a lot less excited about it this time around than when he earned a 21 in week one.

LANCE:
Lance and his partner Lacey were coming off a harsh week, when the judges lambasted Lacey for hogging the spotlight during her favorite dance. This week, Lance got some pointers from some fellow N Sync members (including former champion Joey Fatone), and he gave us a little sob story about how he was always the worst dancer in NSync. He really nailed the Jive this week, though. Some of his acrobatic movements underwhelmed me, but his footwork is really good, and also really well synchronized with his partner, which just makes everything look so much better. The judges agreed, and gave him a 27. This was his best score, the best score of the night, and the first time that someone knocked Brooke off the top of the leaderboard. So, a good week to be a boy bander.

SUSAN:
Susan and her partner Tony gave us a Mambo after landing in the bottom two last week. She needed to give a great performance in order to feel any confidence about continuing in the competition another week. I felt for her, because while the routine had some really awesome moments, she also majorly screwed up at least twice. Worse, when the judges told her that she had lost the music, she denied it even though it was so painfully obvious. Never argue with the judges, Susan! She got a 23, which I think was a real kindness.

BROOKE:
Brooke hurt her leg last week, and limped to a doctor to receive the bad news that she has a strained tendon. This is an injury that she can dance with, but which is likely to keep nagging at her until she takes a week off, which she can't do. The good news for her was she got the Rumba, which can be performed slowly and without a lot of impact on the feet. I thought her Rumba was really fantastic, with a lot of sinuous twisting and great chemistry with her tool of a partner, Derek. But I guess her abbreviated practice times hurt her technique, as both Carrie Ann and Bruno told her it was beneath her usual level of excellence. They each scored it an eight, while the very nice guest judge Michael Flatley gave her a rave review and a 10. I would take Flatley over Bruno or Carrie Ann in a heartbeat.

CLORIS:
Whatever progress Cloris has made over the last two weeks evaporated this week, when she and her partner Mark attempted the Cha Cha Cha. It was just horrible, and I suppose Cloris has just figured out that she's going to be the lowest-scored contestant every week no matter what she does. She didn't land in the bottom two last week, so her atrocious performance may not get her bounced (I wrote at the time). She was so embarrassed after the dance that she couldn't stop laughing at herself.

CODY:
Cody was performing the Samba with his partner Julianne, who is having her appendix removed this week. There was a lot of news coverage about how she got a pain in her gut and had to be rushed to the hospital after last week's show. If she was still wearing her Lucille Ball getup, I hope she turned to the camera and gave a trademark "Rickeeeeeeee" whine while she was being carted off to the ambulance. The judges gave Cody a lackluster 23, which I think should keep him safe. If he's still around next week, he'll be performing with Edyta while Julianne recovers.

WARREN:
Warren and his partner Kym gave the Rumba a try, and this wasn't such a hot week for them. Warren's size tends to hurt him in this kind of dance. The Rumba requires that the upper body be doing one thing in one direction, while the feet are doing something else in the other direction. You're supposed to look like a snake, which is difficult when you're shaped like a balloon. The judges gave them a 25, which I thought was very generous.



Here's what the leaderboard looked like after performance night:

Lance: 27 (+6 = most improved)
Brooke: 26 (-3)
Warren: 25 (no change)
Cody: 23 (-5)
Susan: 22 (+1)
Maurice: 21 (-6 = biggest slide)
Cloris: 15 (-6)

Elimination Night

Michael Flatley slipped on his tapping shoes and put on a pretty amazing performance, the coolest part of which was when he performed from behind a backlit screen. The silhouetted image of him doing his stuff was awesome.

Shamefully, the encore performance was the group hiphop, which was just about the worst thing they've ever done on this show. Everyone was wearing mismatched baggy clothing items, no one was doing the same moves at the same times, and at any given time, there were two or three people who seemed like they weren't on the beat at all. It just looked like a chaotic mess.


We also saw the Pussycat Dolls perform a number with Missy Eliot, which underscored the fact that dressing like a burlesque performer can be called a lesser talent than either singing or dancing.

Next week, they're switching things up. Each couple will perform two dances, but the real twist is that they'll be partnered with another couple for each of those two dances. So I guess it will be choreography for four? That's what it sounded like to me.


They didn't reveal a bottom two this week, so we can't draw any conclusions about the vote. But it looks like Susan's voting audience perked up at the prospect of her elimination, and Cloris was finally, mercifully, retired from the dancing floor.

They said at the beginning of the season that Cloris was filling the "disabled" slot, and she went about as far as Heather Mills or Marlee Matlin did in their respective seasons. There were times when she was funny to watch, but mostly, she just induced cringes, whether she was on the floor or off. Worst of all, she didn't even seem to be trying most of the time. One thing I will say for her. She has completely perfected the ability to ignore cohost Samantha. Any time Samantha tried to interview her, Cloris would wait for her turn to speak and then just blurt out whatever was on her mind. I wish more contestants did that.


The Standings

Well, Paul lucked out this week. He didn't send in a TS, and so he was assigned Lance for TS (Lance being his top pick remaining in the competition). And wouldn't you know it? For the first time in the season, Lance outperformed Brooke, giving Paul 40 big fat bonus points. The bad news for Paul? He's still in last place (although now, just barely). The other big winner for the week was Kim, who picked Cloris to finish in 6th place and therefore lost only 10 points on her ouster. Everyone got 5 points for correctly predicting that Cloris would be the BS.

The big losers of the week were Carl and Dawn, who each picked Cloris out in 12th and lost 50 points as a result. The silver lining there is that if she lasted any longer, it would have hurt them even more.

The standings barely changed, with Kim moving from 6th into a tie for 4th with Carl. I expect the bonus points to play a bigger role from here on out-- with Brooke injured and Cloris gone, the TS/BS is suddenly no longer obvious.


1st: Matt 930 (-30 +5)
2nd: Mike 906 (-30 +5)
3rd: Experts 875 (-60 +5)
4th: Carl 857 (-50 +5)
4th: Kim 857 (-10 +5)
6th: Dawn 832 (-50 +5)
7th: Lisa 803 (-30 +5)
8th: Rick 790 (-40 +5)
9th: Paul 773 (-50 +45)

Good luck, everyone!